[Wishful Thinking] The perfect mobile device?

I want a mobile device (not just a 'phone') that:

• Supports reception and transmission all radio frequencies used worldwide (that means WiFi, radio, all the mobile phone freq.s, all the data freq.s (2G/3G/3.5G/4G/LTE et. al.)
• Captures 1080p ('Full HD') videos at 60fps and 12MP images with perfect low-light capture (output as clear as what a human eye could see at night), with extra bright flash (Infra-red capture? nah, v2.0, maybe),
• Captures HD audio with background noise elimination,
• Has fingerprint and retina scanners,
• Is rugged enough to keep working from -100 to +120 degrees celcius or under water upto 100m under the surface and immune to household chemicals of any sort,
• Has batteries that last 48 hours on a single charge on average normal use or 2 weeks on stand-by and charges from 0% to 100% in 2 minutes,
• Has 400dpi, 4-inch, 16:9 multitouch display,
• Can support up to 10TB of external storage (HDDs & such) through a USB (3.0) cable (For >64GB, may require connection to external power),
• Has SD card support upto 256GB and internal storage of 64GB
• Weighs under 200g and is less than 1.5cm thick
• has Physical buttons for camera, volume, screen lock, silent mode, media playback - all designed to prevent accidental presses,
• Has temperature sensor, accelerometer, gyroscope, proximity, ambient light, GPS, compass.
• Supports all media formats used in more than 1 million files worldwide (that should cover everything you would ever use)AND,
• Has hardware required to run all this fast and efficiently (at the same time, where applicable.)

Would you call it the perfect mobile device?